One young woman began her response with, “I’d like to start by saying that I adore you…”
Babe, I adore you too.
103 women responded to the vulva survey—and about a third of the responses were very long which is why the results took longer to compile this time. Ten percent of the respondents are lesbian or bisexual—a higher percentage than I usually get on surveys; and I am happy about that.
Here is the age/race/relationship status background:
65%, American white
15% European white,
8% African American,
7% Asian American
5% Caribbean islands
41%, Married/living together
25%, Boyfriend (or girlfriend), living separately
30%, Single, sexually active
4%, Single, celibate
1. Do your inner lips hang low or tuck inside?
75% say that your inner lips tuck inside your outer lips. But for a quarter of this group of women, the lips hang low—and because inner labia often are asymmetrical one side may extend further outside the pussy than the other does. African American and island women say they believe they are more likely to have elongated lips than white women. (Yes, in this survey, that is true—but we cannot draw a general conclusion based on a small sampling.)
2. How big is your clitoris? (Or, how well do you know your genital anatomy?
It was a bit of a trick question—and nearly everyone answered predictably. We usually think of the clitoris as that little pink shaft, composed of erectile tissue, that rises up above the clitoral glans (very sensitive tissue) and is protected by the clitoral hood. But that is just the part we can see! Imagine the shaft as the straight bone of the wishbone, with curved “legs”, the crura, planted deep. They are joined to bulbs of spongy erectile tissue. A nest of nerve endings curl and twist connecting the parts of the clitoris to the vagina.
So how big is your clitoris? Bigger than you thought and more powerful.
“When she's getting loved on, she's probably an inch and a half or so, and when she's getting serious love, she seems even bigger than that.”
“My clit is smaller, most of it pretty much covered by a hood of skin. I have to lift it up to expose my whole clit.”
“It stands out. You can see it without parting the lips if I am hot. I’m an African princess.”
3. Do you shave/shape/wax or let your pubic hair furl?
Shaving and trimming are more popular with women (even the under 30 set) now than waxing. Partly that could be attributed to the economy—and partly the pain. Waxing hurts.
“I shave the bikini line and parts that are best kept nude to help keep strays from getting in his teeth.”
“Trim and shape, would love to have smooth, but skin is too sensitive.”
“I shave before sex but leave a fat landing strip,” a 21 year old “white girl” from London.
“I have an Arab lover and he wants me smooth,” a 34 year old French woman.
“Island men are not so much for the shaving and waxing. Neither are African men. When I spent a few months in the States, I waxed and it made me feel turned on all the time, very sexy.”
A European woman in 40s: “Shave and shape, sometimes wax if my lover wants that. I always trim at least—for me, as much as him. The feeling is more intense without the hair in the way.”
4. Are you happy with the way your pussy looks and feels?
Yes, you are happy with your pussies! Only 8% expressed some concerns about how they looked, with longer inner lips and “brown areas” causing the most concern. And some older women say: it still feels good but looked better before the kids.
“Hell, yes! She’s a beauty,” a white married woman in her thirties wrote. Another in her forties confessed that she sometimes admires other women’s pussies and wonder what it would be like to “drive that around for a while--but is “grateful” for her own pussy
“I went through a period of feeling self-conscious about my big fat pussy. I worked in my early 20s for a white gynecologist. Sister, white pussies are smaller with those ‘tucked’ lips you ask about. I have low swinging big purple lips. About the same time, my boyfriend left me for a white girl. But I’m good with my pussy now. Those hanging lips get turned on just walking down the street,” African American single woman, 39.
5. How sensitive are your labia lips, cervix, vagina, G spot, clitoris—and any place else I left out?
For most of you, the labia lips are not particularly sensitive unless you are already aroused. You either love or hate having the cervix tapped by a long penis during intercourse—with more than half hating having the cervix popped.
“My guy has an ideal size dick for me and if we do it doggy style I can feel it hitting my cervix and it makes me scream. And it's not because it hurts, it feel like one of those areas - deep inside your ear, or under fingernails when you had super long ones for months - are that has never been touched,” a white woman in her 20s.
And what does the survey say about vagina/G spot sensitivity? Three fourths of women enjoy thrusting, whether they come that way or not, whether they’ve ever felt their G spots or not. Twenty-five percent do come vaginally or specifically through G spot stimulation—which is just about the norm for all women.
“Love fingers, fingers!” an Asian American bisexual, 30. “Hit my G with your fingers and I’m yours.”
“In my twenties, it did nothing for me. Now in my thirties, g spot stimulation sends me out of this world.”
“I come vaginally—and I am so grateful to you for not being one of those sexperts who takes a stand, either believing or disbelieving in the vaginal O,” white, married and 37.
No surprise—nearly all of you say that your clitoris is the most sensitive place in your pussy and you come that way. About a third enjoy and sometimes come from perineum and/or anal stimulation, including anal intercourse.
“The clit is The Big Mama to The Big O,” African American woman, 33.
“Nothing is as sensitive as my clit. Arouse my clit and the surrounding tissues get sensitive.”
6. What manual and oral clit strokes work best for you—in terms of intensifying arousal and then bringing you to orgasm?
Cunnilingus does it for 81% of you—but not always or not at all for the other 19%
Sme like licking but no sucking. Most want a gentle start, either manually or orally, with pressure building as their excitement does.
“I hate sucking of my clit!”
“I asked my guy to suck my clit after i read it in one of your bibles. He was probably doing it too hard and also his beard was getting in the way and hurting my sensitive parts. “
“I love having my clit touched with finger tips rubbing so lightly, it’s barely touching, no pressure applied.”
“I like her to put two fingers inside me while she sucks. When I masturbate, I use index and middle fingers, but she uses middle and ring fingers. I love it when she massages my G spot while she is eating me out.”
“Sometimes he fucks my with his fingers, bending them to apply pressure to my g spot, while rubbing my clit. So if I'm not distracted and have gathered my sex energy for more than one day, I come. If not, i ask him to go down on me. Just the thought of oral arouses me, and he can pay proper attention to my clit this way while still fingering my intensively.”
“I tend to use the same strokes on myself - generally two fingers on my right hand pulling in from the left side. If it's someone else, my head is so much more involved, that the other person can do whatever to arouse me. Just being nude with someone I'm into gets me going, so anything works.”
“Any strokes work with a partner as long as I get need some kind of thrusting.”
7. Do you play with vibrators—and, if so, how and how often?
SexyPrime babes love their vibes! (And their shower heads.) Over 80% of you use vibes in masturbation and in sex play—as compared to less than half of the population in general. Women in their twenties and African American women in this survey are less likely to own vibes and more reluctant to involve their male lovers in vibe play if they do. After they hit their thirties women—or my readers anyway—stop saying things like “He doesn’t tell me not to use a vibe, so that’s a good thing.”
“I recently asked him to use it on me, he did for a second and then said it was too hot and he's dying to fuck me. I think he's a little intimidated,” a 24 year old white woman in a relationship.
“My boyfriend doesn’t like me to use my vibe. He says I can wait for him. We see each other twice a week, sometimes just once. I can't wait sometimes. But he doesn't get mad or tell me not to use it again.”
“I introduced my new man to my rabbit. I used it on his balls first. ‘Oh, nice,’ he said. I ran it up and down the shaft of his penis. Nice again. But the head was too sensitive for anything but the ears,” a 38 year old American woman living in London.
“I love a vibe, I still can't believe there are women that don’t own one. My husband and I are very comfortable having toys/vibe in our bedroom. My favorite is a bullet for clit stimulation weather by myself or with my husband,” a married white woman in her early 30s.
And a comment that resonated with me: An erotic writer confessed that she uses the Hitachi Magic Wand several times a day when she’s working. Babes, it’s an occupational hazard. Thank you so much for your participation in the vulva survey.
Tomorrow: How Much Do You Love The Pussy: Men Answer 7 Questions
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