“Love the pussy, big-time. If you love the pussy right, a woman will beg to do things to you that you will like a whole lot, or sometimes just grab on and do them without waiting to ask. Unlike post-orgasmic guys who have that lamentable tendency to just fall asleep, post-orgasmic women are often energized, very excited and not nearly ready to stop. Ladies first really works and most women love it, appreciate what you're doing and show that appreciation. Selflessness can be selfish, I suppose, but good giving usually means great getting,” from a devoted SexyPrime reader.
I knew my guys would come through on this one—and you did! Ranging in age from 19 to 58, 268 men responded enthusiastically to the vulva survey. You LOVE the pussy. Speaking on behalf of SexyPrime Babes everywhere, we love you.
Here’s how the demographics break down:
10% over 49
39% White American
37% African American
8% White European
7% Asian American
6% Latino American
32% Married or living with someone
29% Girlfriend, living separately
38% Single, sexually active
1% Single, celibate
1. Do you have a pussy preference, for example, big lips or small, shaved/waved or full bush?
A third of the respondents had no preference. Another third preferred shaved or waxed—with varying degrees of passion. And a third love their women au naturelle. One Senegelese man, 47, asked, “Why do you American women do this thing to yourselves? The bush is beautiful.”
“It has to be clean shaven/waxed. I'm just not into bush.,” African American single man in his thirties.
“I do have a personal preference for shaved pussy but it's not anything like a deal-breaker if it isn't. I like it when the hair is shaped. As far as the lips go, I'm pretty open-minded. When they're bigger there's more to play with but I must admit that when they're small and there's a very snug slit that does seriously harden my dick.”
“I like a little fur on my cat. I don't like it much when a woman is shaved clean, it makes it look.... too young. But I love how the hair traps the natural aroma of the pussy so when you are going down you get to inhale that beautiful funk. Also I like lips that hang down a little bit which also adds to the pleasure of going down.”
2. How do you approach a new pussy?
Overwhelmingly, men said: Gently. “Carefully”. “Experimentally.” “In the looking for guidance mode.” And you most of you understand that what works for one woman won’t necessarily work on the next. I’m not sure about this guy:
“I approach it with intent, the same way I do a familiar pussy—to make her come. Once a man makes a woman come orally, intercourse is a breeze.”
Here’s one of my favorite responses from a married white man (with occasional lovers) over fifty:
“There's no consistent ‘right’ way to go down on any one woman let alone on all women you have the opportunity to go down on… Some women don't like a lot of . pressure. Some don't feel it fully unless you press firmly. Start slowand respond to physical reaction and also to pleasure sounds and to direct verbal instructions. If a woman doesn't know what gets her off, you should be prepared to try lots of different approaches. If she does know and tells you, it's stupid not to follow direction--although being a little more experimental after the first orgasm should be OK.”
3. Have you ever met a pussy you didn’t like—and why not?
For most men, it’s not about the way your lips hang—it’s about how your pussy smells. They want it clean. (Don’t we want that cock clean before we put it into our mouths?) Some comments:
“It didn’t smell good; and that’s all I’m going to say about that,” an African American man in his twenties.
“I've run into a couple that needed a bit of clean-up first but none that I ever felt like turning away from. I like having my dick sucked and it's not reasonable to expect a woman to do for you what you won't do for her.”
“It was an unkempt Amazon rain forest. Urrglllhhh!!!! I just don’t like pubic hair, even on myself.”
And from a married white man in his thirties who hasn’t been with another woman in ten years: “I can’t imagine a bad pussy. They must all be good.”
4. Do you enjoy performing cunnilingus and are you good at it?
Yes!—you are overwhelmingly enthusiastic about cunnilingus. Most of you also think you are good at it. Only 5% of men said they didn’t like to, or wouldn’t, go down on a woman. Interestingly, they were African men or older African American men; only two white men said No to eating pussy.
“I love being asked if I'm good at something. My answer remains the same: I must be pretty good if they keep pulling my back down,” an African American man in his twenties.
“Absolutely—and I am great at it,” a married African American man in his forties.
And from one of my most eloquent survey respondents:
“I've done it on almost every woman I've gone to bed with and all the ones I've done it on had orgasms, including one woman who had never had an orgasm before. I think my skills are adequate and my dedication is serious and sincere. No one has complained, at least not until the second hour when fatigue starts to set in. I'm not just going on their say-so about the orgasms either. I suppose it's possible that a woman has faked an orgasm for me but in most cases some loss of control, increased flow of vaginal fluid and the internal pulsations accompanying the orgasm are generally pretty convincing proof that they're for real.”
5. What are your best strokes to bring her pleasure?
Again, you know that there is no one true path to female pleasure. (“It depends on the woman; she has to show or tell me what she wants.”) But many described combinations of strokes that have proved effective on more than one woman. Why don’t you guys start sending me sex tips? Imagine this book: Oral Sex Tips For Lesbians and Bi-Girls From The Male Readers of SexyPrime.
This one from a very quotable young African American husband: “My personal favorite, the Folded Deck Chair: the guy is on top and the woman rests her legs on your shoulders giving you full access to g-spot stimulation and ultra deep penetration. Nothing beats the Folded Deck Chair.”
“Depends on the woman. Some respond amazingly to broad lapping up-and-down strokes of the entire vaginal area. Some respond to a stiffened end of the tongue and a slightly stabbing motion. Some go crazy for very light, very slow swirling touches.”
And this one from another favorite correspondent, a white married man in his fifties: “My tongue gently caressing her clit while my finger is applying direct and firm come hither pressure on he g-spot and urethra.”
6. Does she touch herself during intercourse—and do you like that?
Only half report that their partners touch themselves during intercourse—and another quarter would love to see that happen and, yes, have even begged for it. The remaining less than 25% believe that their cocks (especially post-cunnilingus) should be enough. Those came primarily from these groups: African American men over 49, Africans, Asian and Latino men in their twenties. Go figure.
It’s an important question because most women do need direct clitoral stimulation in addition to thrusting to reach orgasm. The answer is important too. In this survey, half the No Touch women have partners who wish they would.
“Yes she does and it gives me great pleasure to watch and learn how she is using her finger. Then I get to do it. Yeah!”
“She enjoys masturbating when we're doing it doggystyle for double stimulation. Sometimes when we are watching porn I take her hand and force her to masturbate herself, then when she gets when I lick her fingers. Needless to say, I love when a woman masturbates during sex. Actually I just enjoy watching women pleasure themselves, regardless.”
“No, she doesn’t. I have encouraged my wife to do that because it would be a great turn-on for me—but, no.”
“As long as we don't get in each other's way it's all good. Watching a woman use her own hands to please herself can be extraordinarily erotic and very, very arousing as it indicates a high level of trust and openness. Whatever works for her, works for me.”
7. Does she use a vibrator—and have you ever used one on her?
75% of you say that she does use a vibrator—and most of that 75% have used one on her. SexyPrime readers are definitely ahead of the sexual curve. (A recent survey of women showed that less than half owned vibes.) The 25% reporting little or no vibe experience were African American men in their twenties or over 49, African men and Asians and Latinos in their twenties.
“Most of the women I've been with have used vibrators, sometimes with me there. I've not used one on all the women I've been with but I've done it whenever the opportunity arose and have suggested it routinely. My tongue sometimes gets tired but our little mechanical buddies work amazingly well and don't often get tired. I tend to favor plug-ins over battery-powered but some of the special designs are worth the risk of the occasional interruption to switch batteries when needed.”
“We both enjoy employing the help of the Pocket Rocket when I’m on top as it tingles my penis and sends quivers through her pussy.”
“If she’s a Western woman, surely she has used a vibrator. Why would she not?”
I leave you with that closing thought.
ASK AUNTIE SUE returns next Monday.
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