SexyPrime’s male readers despise Freddie at least as much, possibly more, than the women do. (I love the letter from a former colleague of Freddie’s who said she roared over the description of his prized white mustache as reminding me of lab rat hair.) Many men lamented, I know how to treat a woman; and I can't get laid. Why do women overlook nice guys and fall for Beastly Men?
My theory: One, Beastly Men are often quite adept at putting on the fake charm mask and they take over while nice guys may hang back. 2. We all subliminally look for what we think we deserve; and Desperate Women have low expectations. Perhaps subconsciously, they believe that they are lucky to have even the occasional company of a man who has a somewhat functional penis and a job—a low bar indeed.
I am not publishing the letters of desperation because the rest of my readers are ready to move on to Sexy Beasts! (Me too. I adore my Sexy Beast, so named for his abundance of chest hair, running down his belly too AND his high sex drive. I could rhapsodize over his cock until you begged me to shut up.) M and Kimmie have excellent advice for the DWs—advice that is positive for everyone, even Nice Guys, who have put up with bad treatment for too long.
Kimmie—[Find her erotica under the category “Kimmie” on the right hand side]
“Stop and take a good hard look at how you and the Beastly Man interact.
“Be your own best friend and analyze the situation. What would you say to your BFF if ishe were going through this? Are you spending a lot of time trying to please him, trying to make changes to make him happy? Are criticisms, whether blunt or cloaked in backwards compliments, most of what comes out of his mouth? Is he disrespectful? Does he make you feel good when he wants to - as well as make you feel bad when he wants to? Is how YOU feel dependent on him? Is this a relationship that you would want for your best friend?
“If the answer is NO, then it's likely not a relationship that you really want for yourself, either.
“Once you recognize that you are a Desperate Woman, it’s over. You have no excuse. You see who he is and what is happening between you—and you have to move on.”
I love Kimmie’s very practical advice—and M’s rather bold and surprising take on the subject:
M [Find his posts under the category, “M, The Assmaster” on the right hand side]
“First, the 7 underlying causes of much desperation in women—
1. Social/cultural expectations that a woman is not "fulfilled" if she does not have a man in her life.
2. "Mommy guilt", including not only the pressure to be the perfect mother, but to have children by a certain age.
3. Sexual double standards
4. The almost entirely false idea that one can "have it all" which creates unrealistic life expectations
5. The unfortunate fact that there are still a fair fraction of men in the world who have the mindset of the guy who wrote that letter about "Why do women cheat?”
6. The fashion, diet and fitness industries for dealing a huge shitload of guilt on women.
7 . Christianity, Islam, and other misogynistic patriarchal religions.
“Desperate Women likely deny many of their sexual impulses (suppressed by these 7 factors) and make all kinds of important decisions about relationships while suffering from a huge unmet need to scratch their sexual itch.
“MY proposed solution (and it is counterintuitive, because the behavior I propose is what many people would describe as the typical conduct of Desperate Women) is to own their sexuality and make it a priority to get their physical needs very on a frequent basis, with casual hookups and booty calls if necessary.
“They should ALWAYS fuck on the first date if they think there is any possible chance that might want a second one....not only to scratch the itch, but also to check his bedroom skills. You want to know if he is any good in the sack BEFORE you spend so much time with him that you develop an emotional attachment.
“In an enlightened society, we wouldn’t have dinner to see if we want to have sex with someone; we would have sex to see if we want to have dinner.”
Now, moving on—
Q. “I love your Sex Wardrobe Basics techniques and positions. The Boyfriend Shirt Quickie is my favorite. Tell me how I can have a quickie in a tight dress—without spoiling the dress?” Penelope, London.
A. Thank you! The Sex Wardrobe Basics [see category on right hand side] are very popular on SexyPrime.
Have you tried The Pencil Skirt Quickie? It would also work with a tight dress. The key is hiking the skirt (dress) high enough up your thigh (or higher) to give you freedom of movement.
But I love the idea of a new quickie position based on the tight dress. I’m already working on it. Check back this weekend for the newest Sex Wardrobe Basic—inspired by your question.
And finally THE NEW CONTEST—
Send me your stories of great sex with a Sexy Beast. The two winners will receive a copy of any one of my or my friend Dr. Sonia Borg’s Quiver books. Check them out at Qbookshop.
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