I can come while giving The Basic Black Dress of Blow Jobs without humping his leg or stroking my clit if—
- I’m really into the cock/the man.
- I was highly aroused before I took his cock in my mouth.
- I coordinate my breathing in time with the strokes—and imagine a ring of fire going through his cock, into my mouth and out through my vagina.
In The New Tantra: Simple and Sexy, I called this The Wild Card Chakra Trick. (The fifth chakra is located at the throat.) Whether you put faith in chakras or not, some women—not just me—can reach orgasm while performing fellatio without manual or oral clitoral stimulation. I’ve had hundreds of emails from women who can and do.
One wrote, “I am embarrassed to admit this to anyone else, but I can come while giving a BJ too if I am really aroused. Other women angrily accuse you of lying if you tell them you’ve had experiences they haven’t had. Acceptable girlfriend sex talk is complaining about how you can’t come because men are lousy lovers. I shared the link to your lemondrop piece on the subject to get some GF reaction—and most screamed, ‘It is not possible! Some man wrote this crap! Male fantasy!’”
Yes, it is possible. How?
Fire breathing oxygenates the blood, increasing and sustaining arousal. Flexing a well-toned PC muscle when you are in a highly aroused state can induce orgasm. Read The Orgasm Loop, angry doubters. You can come no-hands if you learn the O Loop technique.
The vagus nerve which goes straight into the brain winds throughout our bodies, touching many body parts, including the throat and upper palate—and the vagina. In fact, some women with spinal cord injuries experience orgasm in the brain (as documented in fMRI machines). I wrote about this in The Sex Bible for Women.
Because a no-hands, BJ is such a thrilling experience, I am calling the technique an essential sex skill and re-naming it The Skinny Jeans BJ Orgasm. Yes, skinny jeans, as in slim and tight, are in right now. But “skinny jeans”—as in the pair you can only fit into at five pounds below your usual weight—are always in style. You feel so good when you can zip them up and strut your best stuff.
With this technique, you strut your best stuff and nobody enjoys it more than you do because it feels so good all over—
- Suck the head of his penis and pay attention to how your throat is responding. Does it seem to quiver or vibrate faintly in time with your sucking? Focus on those sensations.
- As you are sucking him, breathe deeply and rhythmically.
- Imagine that your breath is a circle of fire inhaled into your nostrils, filling your mouth and throat, and exhaled through your genitals. Feel that fire vibrating your throat?
- Flex your PC muscle in time with your breathing and sucking.
Focus, breathe and flex—and you can come.
Other sex tips in the ongoing series of sex technique wardrobe basics:
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