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September 03, 2009


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King Cormack

I don't have an opinion, really. I have never cheated on anyone and almost no one I know has copped to cheating.

And why would they? I'm not an anonymous, faceless form on the internet and my life experience is that people lie all the time, about things great and small, even when it's unnecessary to lie. As they say on Long Island, "Go figure".


Call me paranoid but I'm not about to answer that query with my real name attached.

I'd call it a true and possibly ultimate victory for women's liberation. Now all women have to do is learn the truest secret of infidelity. Like Fight Club, we don't talk about Infidelity, ever. At least not about our own infidelity. General discussion, maybe, as long as it's understood to be on a theoretical basis.

I would not be at all surprised if it's true that more women cheat than men and I'd swear I'd heard somewhere "else" recently that it's so.

Of course, everyone, especially men, lie about whether they're screwing around or not, so it's really tricky to decide whether the survey, or any survey, has any basis in real truth.

Only when you get caught in flagrante should you actually even consider admitting it and that's only when there's no possibility of explaining it away. Call me old-fashioned.

Love and kisses,

A Woman

It is certainly possible. In my marriage, I am married to "the perfect man." Unless he was relentlessly pursued by a very attractive woman and at the same time I was completely rejecting him, I don't think he'd ever even dream of cheating. He's happy and he loves me.

Me on the other hand did get a bit of a wild hair last year, was not feeling emotionally connected at the time with my husband and the opportunity to hook up with an ex appeared and I acted on it. It is not something I have planned to ever do again. But, I know now that no matter how you were raised or who you are, it's always possible that you will do the very things you never thought you would.


I had heard an interview on NPR with the author of "Lust in Translation" which spoke about infidelity in different countries. Here's a link to the broadcast: http://www.onpointradio.org/2007/11/infidelity-rules-rebroadcast
I recall how the author pointed out that as Americans we talk about our affairs to death...therapy for years and what not...vs how in France, (which apparently has the same rate of infidelity as America), people are more likely to sort of "move on" from an affair...Interesting stats too on the high percentage of men who cheat in poor countries vs the high percentage of women who cheat in wealthy countries...


My strange POV is that women are, by nature, more sexual than men and that patriarchy is a backlash against female sexuality, designed to control and repress it. Remove the patriarchal strictures on female behavior, and women will return to their more biologically natural behaviors. I.e., women want sex! Lots of it!

We have a greater capacity for orgasms, a greater capacity for repeat performances, much better stamina (compare a female pro to a male), and our sex organs are amazingly sturdy compared to those of the male of the species. Unlike a penis, the clit has only one purpose: pleasure (nod to Sue Katz for saying it first). The vagina is a unique and miraculous organ in its ability to expand and adapt, and particularly in its ability to endure severe trauma (birth) and then recover naturally. Biologically it all adds up to a superior sexual model. (Which is NOT to say we're superior human beings, not any more than bigger muscles make men superior beings.)

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